Wednesday, May 10, 2017

"Construction Ahead...Expect Delays...Mama's Under Construction"

What are your feelings when you see that word, those signs, those cones?
We live in a time where we are ready to get to where we are going and get there now. We don't have time or patience for delays.  So what if this construction that's gonna take years to complete is gonna make things better, we need convenience now.  The waiting, the unknown, the disaray of things, can literally stress us out. 
A little over 13 years ago, I went snow skiing for the first time and I think it was my 3rd time down the mountain that I crashed and burned and tore my ACL. I didn't get it repaired because I was pregnant after going to the doc & him telling me I didn't really need it to run.  So 4 kids later... I am still running and also taking classes at my gym.  I have fallen a few times over the years from the instability of my knee and it would literally buckle and I would go to the floor.  Not fun. But it would always be ok after a couple weeks and I would get right back to it.  Over the last 6 months or so, I have had more issues to the point of swelling and pain and unable to run and work out like I always had.  The MRI revealed the torn ACL and Meniscus torn on both sides. Yikes! There were no "ifs, ands, or buts"... surgery was in my future.  
I decided before the kids were out for summer... I would knock it out.  Or better to be put as, It would knock Me Out!  I guess I didn't realize the extreme pain that would come to live with me...but I have come to know it well.  
It's been challenging.  I have had to keep my focus on the love that has been poured on my family.  The Lord has sent many. Cards &  flowers &  treats &  texts &  visits that literally MADE MY DAYS!!!!  I began to love visitors.  It was hard for me to say yes to meals at first... I even kindly declined a couple.  But once they started and I was incapable of doing anything around here... I said "yes, yes, yes".   I am so thankful I said yes. My children have experienced it with me and "Wowed" and asked "Why? Why all this food?" It's been awesome for them to see people helping us, showing us love, the Lord providing for us.  I would get nightly entertainment watching my cute husband's face peek into the bag and be giddy telling the kids what it was.  Thank you Lord for these gifts.
The days have been long.  I have had many moments of pain, discouragement, tears. But I just have to keep pulling it back together, lean on the Lord & dear ones &  we will get through it.  It could be much worse I absolutely know this.
I looked for positive quotes about being "under construction" and absolutely loved what I found!  It put a whole new perspective on this... Even though this Mama is Under Construction and I can expect some delays.... He's working on me in all ways.  He is reminding me to persevere, to know joy is around the corner, to count these trialing times as pure joy, trusting Him to rebuild me and for what's to come. The funniest thing of all I have realized is that.... 
I Will Always Be Under Construction
 The Lord will "always" be working on me.  So it's ok to wait, to be patient, to expect delays.  The new road he paves is always better.  If you are going through some unexpected delays or construction days... The Master Builder Has Us & will finish his masterpieces in his timing.

Let's Do this!

Home and time to start my compression on my calves to prevent blood clots & my doggie to keep me calm

1st day of therapy.... I cried getting on the table... the pain was NOT under control 

The incisions and the swollen knee.... time to heal

I look white as a ghost and yes I have a walker... but something about the first meal that was brought being country cookin & so much food, so much love

Car rides to doctor and therapy were tough.... They hurt, they were uncomfortable... but thank the Lord they are better.

Always snuggle buddies for Mama

When you are having a tough Saturday morning and literally were crying 5 minutes before a friend drops by unexpectedly and comes out on my patio to give me unwrapped tootsie rolls cause she knows I love tootsie rolls and they made her think of me.  I literally start balling when I see her because there is something comforting about crying on someone's shoulder.

My eyes are red... cause the crying happened but as soon as my friend left... my kids walk outside with flowers from my sweet sissy & mama.... God is so amazing how he literally wipes our tears away with friends and flowers and family.

More of my favorite candy treats and beautiful flowers... cheer... cheer...cheer.. this gal.

There have been moments I have certainly felt like there is a lot of chaos because of me... this surgery... me being unable to be me.

Knee Comparison... Swelling has went down a little

She has made me laugh and I have enjoyed her expressions and talks

Enjoying more food from friends... Feeling so blessed. 
Night after night of food for our bellies and Mama's soul

Everywhere we go... she's right by my Jensie Jewel

I had been to therapy and came home to this! YUMMY!  My mother & father in law sending sweet love

I don't know if you can read this but my friend sent me this and it literally hit right at home for me.  I am sure looking for that joy around the corner.  

This card

How I sleep... went from calf compression to foot cuffs... all to prevent blood clots.  I am suppose to wear them for 30 days while I sleep.  The squeeze me and it's annoying.  

My Uber Driver
My Nurse
My Waiter
My put the kids to bed Daddy
My get the kids up and ready and to school Daddy
My love
The one that I know if he is with me... It will be ok. 
It hasn't been all roses. It's had it's thorny moments. But no matter what...
He won't quit on me. 
We got this.

My other little helpers that have been so sweet and gracious to my pain and needs.
It's hard being their mother and them all standing around your bed to give goodbye kisses before school and they just watch as Daddy helps me into bed and I am literally crying like a baby with pain. I felt so bad for them to see me but I couldn't help it. 

My 3rd good day.... lets pull Mama to the park in our neighborhood... 
Noah pulled me home and all the littles walked behind me.  It was a moment for me.... taking it in that my children are taking care of me.
Everything is gonna be alright.
I am currently under construction and forever I will be.

1 comment:

Kent Linda said...

You are a marvelous example.
So thankful your healing is accompanied by friends, food, fun, fellowship.
We are looking forward to seeing where your four go in life.

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